We had a wonderful Holiday season this year. There were a few bumps, but all in all, it was sweet. I have met a few Grinches and Scrooges this year. Several have expressed how much they HATE Christmas. In fact I talked to one today and asked her if she was better than last week. She had told me last week that she was really ornery and it was because how much she hates Christmas. She even told me to ask her husband. This week she was all better, and she told me the tree was down and things were looking up. I feel sorry for her and her husband.
I don't understand this and really don't want to. I sort of know how much I hated Mother's day for years, it was because I felt inadequate. I felt like I just couldn't live up to all those wonderful stories of the PERFECT Mother that was the Speaker's mother. It didn't matter who was speaking, their mother was THE BEST ever.
So Maybe that is what being a Scrooge is all about, feeling pressure to be something you are not. Whether it is Santa, making it all magical for your kids, making sure the house is perfectly clean, bedding all in order, enough warm blankets, worrying about the food or the expenses, etc.
I used to feel overwhelmed and beat myself up for not accomplishing all the goals I had set out to do, but lately, I have chilled a bit. I forgive myself for not being super human. I budget money all year, saving out a certain amount, so I don't feel overwhelmed by money or lack thereof. I do the best I possibly can and that is all I can do. I have read some blogs of friends who claim to be OCD, where they want everything perfect, including the house to look spotless, and they about kill themselves off picking up after everyone and being upset over a bit of a mess. I guess I am glad I am a perceiver, one who doesn't have to have everything just perfect. The mess does get to me, but not to that extent.
Life is too short. I must find the humor in living. I must find the blessings that are all around me. I have family. I have sisters, a brother, and Mom, plus in-laws, and especially children and now grandchildren, who love me and whom I love dearly. We have our health and our lives. I'm not forgetting our beloved Dads who both have died and we miss them, but on the most part, we are all doing well.
A neighbor's young daughter just lost her husband in a car accident. He had a seizure and died while at the wheel. She is barely 25 or 26, a young mother of a year-old baby and pregnant with another. She just lost her husband, and on Christmas Day. We have our family and I am so grateful for this.
The blessing in my life right now is to have my sweet S3 home from his mission. He is the amazingly sweet and kind young man who just got married this last October. It was sweet to have him come home and watch him with his sisters who all just adore him. We have missed him while he served a 2-year mission for our Church.
Likewise, it was sweet to have D3, D2, and D1 with their spouses here as well. They are married to very sweet spouses who love them and treat them well. We also got to have a sweet little grandson here, he is so sweet. Children really put life into Christmas. And last, but not least is my precious husband. He loves me, shows me daily his love for me, in words and deeds. He is one of the kindest people I could have ever been lucky enough to marry and still be married to for almost 34 years. I want to return his sweetness and emulate his kindness. What a blessing to have a sweet spouse.
Besides family, I belong to a Church that I love. I love having a testimony of my Savior, and knowing He loves me enough to suffer and die on the cross for me and all of mankind. That sobering thought is enough to bring me to my knees to repentance of any sin I ever committed or will in the future. I love my Heavenly Father, who knows me by name and loves me enough to send His Son to Earth.
So, I guess what I am saying is, I could get all caught up in the Christmas rush and be disappointed in the things I didn't do or get, or be sad because of other real or imagined things, but I think my attitude is really all about Gratitude. When I count my blessings, then the slights, the failures, and all the other things that may have gone wrong don't seem so bad.
I know that when I am feeling grumpy, whether it is sickness or a bad day, it usually boils down to selfishness. If I reach out and serve someone, it helps me to not focus on my real or imagined problems. I try to think of my dear sweet husband and how I look to him. I always want to look good, to always be sweet and kind. I never want to hurt him. He is my best friend and the most important person. And I am so grateful to him.
I hope those of you who are reading this are having a wonderful day, and I wish you all a Happy New Year. God Bless your lives, families and homes in the coming year.